


I Don't Know How (And I Don't Know Why)

by happy_ending



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Depression, Happy Ending?, Lost Boys, M/M, junpei breaks, kind of, teppei breaks, they break together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-27
Updated: 2016-08-27
Packaged: 2018-08-11 06:53:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7880842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/happy_ending/pseuds/happy_ending
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Teppei isn't a man of many words.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Don't Know How (And I Don't Know Why)

Teppei isn't a man of many words.

In fact he rather stays silent and observs. He stays silent and talks if he needs to. Some say he's odd and funny looking with that happy-go-lucky smile and attidude. Some say he's creepy for smiling like a idiot all the time. Some say he's dumb for wearing his heart on his sleeve. Some call him "Iron Heart". Some call him their "Rock".  
And a lot of times he ignores them and moves on. And most of the time it doesn't bother him. If they ask him he says he's fine and thats that. Nobody asks him again. 

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Teppei isn't a man of many words.

He helps his Teammates with their problems. Their fears of not being good enough to win the winter cup.  
He helps his grandparents after school if they need him to.  
He helps classmates with problems in a suject he's good at.

He helps and says it doesn't bother him.  
He helps and does it again and again and again.

He helps and it's enough for now.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Teppei isn't a man of many words.

He listens and talks if he thinks it will help. 

He never judges anyone. He never lies to anyone. He never betrays anyone.

He hopes it's enough.  
\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Teppei isn't a man of many words.

In a way he likes that everyone asks him to help them with whatever problems they have, even if it's as small as to listen.  
He likes to know everyone trusts him to keep a secret. He likes that he's a person people can trust.

He thinks thats enough.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Teppei isn't a man of many words.

However, even he breaks. He cries. He suffers. He shatters. Even he feels alone.  
And every morning he tells himself: "You're good. You're protecting them. You're here for them. You can do this. Just one more."

And every night he tells himself: "You can do one more. Just hold on. This is why you came back. To protect. To fight. To do the right thing. You can do this."  
And every time he breaks a little more. Cracks and shatters. Stays silent throughout his pain and suffering.

It has to be enough.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Teppei isn't a man of many words.

When he speaks everyone goes silent. They listen but do not hear. They do not hear how his sentences got shorter over the last months. How he tries not to take too much room in a conversation and let others talk rather than himself. How he never laughs or smiles anymore. 

Junpei does,  
He notices.  
He sees but does nothing to stop it. He hears but does nothing against it.

They break at the same time. 

It has to be enough.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Teppei isn't a man of many words.

But be would tell you he started living with his grandparents when he was five years old. He would tell you about how much he loves basketball and how much he enjoys playing with hyuuga and all his other teammates.  
He would tell you that his favourite colour is purple and his favourite animals are dogs.  
He would tell you all these things if you asked.  
He wouldn't tell you about how he lays in bed at night starring at his ceiling with no thought at all. He wouldn't tell you about the days where he would rather stay in bed than to go to school because he is scared of his own mind. He wouldn't tell you about these dark nights where he does not sleep because his thoughts are kepping him awake. These days where he feels alone. These thoughts that drain all of his energy.  
Nobody wants to know these things anyway.

And it's enough for now.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Teppei isn't a man of many words.

Junpei isn't either.

Somehow they work. On and off the basketball court.  
They know it. Their team knows it.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Teppei isn't a man of many words.

Some days it's bad and other days it's cruel.  
His grandparents worry. He tells them he's fine. His teammates ask how he's doing today and he says he's fine. Nobody ever questions it.

But with Hyuuga, it's not that easy. Hyuuga looks him in the eye and doesn't back down. He is constanly looking at him. When Teppei says he's fine Hyuuga says bullshit.

And in the middle of it all he breaks. He shatters. He cracks. He cries.  
Junpei helps him through it.

And it's enough for now.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

For the next few months he tries to fix himself.  
For the next few weeks Junpei is by his side and tells him: "You are doing this for youself. Not for your grandparents. Not for our teammates. Not for me. Not for anyone but youself." and "you can do this. I'm here. You are not alone."

And slowly, Teppei starts to sleep more.  
And quietly, Teppei starts to fix himself.  
And slowly, Teppei starts to be himself again.

and very slowly the darkness and sadness is replaced by something brighter, happier, more consuming.

It's not all good but it's bearable.  
It's not great but he manages.

And finally, finally it's enough.  
It's enough.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Teppei isn't a man of many words,

and thats alright with Junpei.

 

It's enough.

**Author's Note:**

> First Story ever. Hope you liked it.


End file.
